Wedding season is back again and as I look at all my brides-to-be girlfriend fretting over their to-do-list, I find myself fondly looking back to my very own that happened last year. A particular interesting incident that I remembered was of how worried I was on the wedding etiquette my guests may not have, and upon publishing the post on my dayre, some of them were actually upset with me – particularly on the dress codes. LOL. You’ll read on to find out what I’d suggested was nothing out of the ordinary, but perhaps in our culture, people just take things for granted?
1. No +1s
One invitation card = one guest.
Especially when having an intimate wedding that seats less than 100 pax, I would appreciate that my guests do not spring a sudden +1 on me. No kids, no partners, no new flames, and of course, please don’t bring your whole family along. I really have no more seats. Besides, I only know you?
2. Strictly adhere to the dress code
I’m not holding my wedding luncheon at a hawker centre so please don’t dress like you’re going to one. This is not a casual event. So keep your flipflops/sandals/denims/tshirts/singlets at home, have some class. Please.
I have cringed time and again at how awfully some locals dress to weddings. It shows not only utter disrespect to the couple, but the individual as well. There’s a time and place for everything. A wedding is not one to dress down. Period.
3. Don’t wear white (for ladies)
I’m going to be quite long-winded on the dress codes actually. As chillax as I can be, I reckon wedding etiquette will be the main reason I turn into a full pledged bridezilla. It’s basic courtesy, and the lack of it shows utter disrespect to the couple. I have zero tolerance for that.
Wearing white is my prerogative on my big day, not yours. You can wear it any time of the year, just not on my special day, as my guest. It’s not that you can’t wear any white whatsoever — white accents and prints are fine — but anything overtly bridal, especially white lace, would mean that you’re just trying to stir shit up.
4. Don’t wear black (for ladies)
This is not a funeral nor a cocktail party, it’s a luncheon in a very white space. Lighten up already! I would have close one eye if I’m holding a wedding dinner but nope!
5. Turn up on time
We are starting at 12.30pm SHARP.
Come earlier for canapes (that’s to entice you actually haha), latecomers shall not be entertained. It’s rude of you to even think of coming late like a typical chinese banquet when it isn’t. Long table, western lunch? Sounds Asian to you? Nope, so no Asian timing either.
6. Don’t outshine the bride
Don’t you even dare think about it.
Unless you don’t value this friendship/kinship that is. I really can never understand people that think it is ok to do so. The golden rule of all wedding, the number one wedding faux to ever commit. So don’t push your limit, unless you never want to hear from me again.
7. Don’t PS me
I can’t believe I’ve almost forgotten to add this 2nd most important etiquette in my list!
For all weddings, I think it is totally fucked up if you RSVP for a wedding only to disappear on the actual day with no valid reason. I, shamefully, only fail to attend once, when I was feeling so unwell I couldn’t get out of bed. Other than that, I have always make it a point to attend all weddings I have RSVP-ed to, even if it means flying over during closing period.
Thus, I expect the same for mine.
I won’t beat around the bush. Every seat cost money, and I could have cut this lost out if you have informed me beforehand. I have been nothing but thankful to my girlfriends who have personally informed way beforehand that they couldn’t make it. Even more thankful to my scoot couple who postponed their holiday plans because they remembered it was my wedding weekend ❤️
So yea, those were my expectations and I was very vigilant about it thanks to our small scale wedding. In fact, I even memorized the guest seats at the back of my hand so a quick scan will easily help me identify who is missing or was being an inconsiderate bitch 😡
What are your Do’s and Dont’s for your wedding? Did any of the above strikes a chord? x